The Helpful Husband

An elderly woman was caught shoplifting. The store owner thought she had been shoplifting for some time, and finally caught her at it. At trial, she pleaded guilty and threw herself on the mercy of the court. The judge asked, “What did you steal?” “A can of peaches.” “Why did you steal them?” “I am too poor to afford peaches but really love them, so I took them.” “How many peaches were in the can?” “The label said ‘six’.” The judge frowned, cleared his throat, and pronounced the sentence: “You stole six peaches, so I sentence you to six days in jail.”

As the gallery gasped at the severity of the sentence, her husband stood up in the back of the courtroom and asked if he could say a few words. “Certainly,” replied the judge, “if they are relevant.” “Doesn’t the police record show that she also stole a can of peas?”

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